QUEST

Find your truth
own your truth
live your truth
they say

Well, my truth is locked
away
beyond reach
behind bars

I don’t let myself
see it
smell it
sense it at all

Awaken your wild Self
listen to Her
’cause she knows
they say

I love this
yet i find myself
incapable
paralysed

That ancient fear
as old as me
ancient companion
which i cannot hate

has learned
and adapted
and grown
with me

she grants me
small victories
lets me rejoice
in them

Yet
when it’s time for me
to reach for it
for happiness

she awakens.
My fierce fear
an untamed, growling
beast

each time
her rage
wreaks havoc
in my off-guard self

I withdraw
my hand
i protect
my heart

Cooperating
so fucking smoothly
my ego
justifies her

the reasoning
flawless
the logic
impeccable

It wasn’t fear
what nonsense!
but your desire
for freedom

It wasn’t fear
don’t be silly!
but your love
for the run.

—

And so you
eat it all up and
sell it so well
you end up believing it

This is who i am, you say,
i dance, i run
i long
for the wilderness

A poor creature
who dreams
of the wolves
of her wild Self

grown to believe
her cage
is her vital
strength

She runs
so fast
she no longer
even sees it.